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“You're a 35-year-old with a $600 net worth who spends like a billionaire on vacation and works like a medieval peasant.”

“You have $100 in savings and a $3,000 debt, meaning you are currently less financially stable than the person you're planning to tattoo.”

“You're 34 with the net worth of a lucky 12-year-old and a sleep schedule that makes a raccoon look productive.”

“You're an SEO pro who’s managed to rank your savings on the second page of Google where nobody will ever find them.”

“A Cologne dev with a billionaire dream and the net worth of 218 kebabs is just a bot with a hunger problem.”